September 2007

Down To Earth Newsletter
Volume 6 – Issue 8 – September, 2007

ART OF RECOVERY EXPO – Saturday, Sept. 29th – Please join us at the Phoenix Convention Center for the 3rd Annual Art of Recovery Expo, an enthusiastic FREE celebration of recovery in all of its forms. Twelve Step participants can bring their recovery medallions to our Mardi Gras themed booth where we encourage attendees to “Show Us Your Chips!” in exchange for beads and novelties. I will be doing a FREE workshop at 11:00 am, entitled, “Achieving Empathy, Actively,” to teach parents how to help their teens understand the limits parents must place on them in a fun manner, and without arguments. The expo is FREE and is open to the public from 10a-5p. Stop in and visit!!!


Debunking Myths – If Men got Pregnant, Things Would Be Different
Myth: Many of my clients are single mothers, either women who got pregnant before they were married whose partners did not marry them, or women who were married, but later divorced, after one or more children were born. Some single mothers have very young children, while others are struggling to raise a handful of teens without much male influence. Although I have never heard a mother wish she didn’t have her children, many have said that if men were the ones to get pregnant, things would be different.

Fact: Although we cannot prove such a theory, I’m going to go out on a limb and say that the concept, is most certainly true. It is my opinion that if men were the ones to have to carry pregnancies, there would not be so many mothers out there raising children without fathers. However, I would also wager a guess that there would be about 80% fewer children in the world as well.

I do not condone men getting women pregnant, then leaving them to raise children on their own. However, other than cases of rape, pregnant women were at least 50% responsible for their own pregnancies and for the choice of the father. When they choose badly, impulsively, or even deceptively become pregnant, they put themselves into a position where they are quite likely to become unsupported during their pregnancy and during the life of the child. The good news about that is that it also means women have the power to make better choices.

We hear a great deal of talk about women’s reproductive rights and how it’s her body and that she should be able to do with it what she wants. If that’s what you believe, it must also follow that if she chooses to get pregnant and remain pregnant, that’s a choice she made and she must be willing to face all the consequences that go along with becoming pregnant and not later waste her energy blaming a man for her predicament.

Yes, if men had to get pregnant, things would be different. There would be fewer unwanted children. Women need to take special care to make sure that all the children they bear are truly wanted by both parents if they want the best chance to guarantee the child a future of being supported by both of their natural parents.

August Discussion Question: What’s your favorite family tradition?

Frequent contributor, Kory K., of AZ, offers this delightful tradition:

Well, my favorite family tradition, which was started from my stepdad’s half of the family, is this game we play on the holidays where we call each of the family members and tell them Merry Christmas or Happy Halloween or Happy Easter first. You know, 6am in the morning when they’re least expecting it. Merry Kwanzaa and April Fools – who cares if they hang up – that’s one point for me!

Thanks, Kory! Your DrMarlo prizes are on their way!

September Discussion Question: In your life right now, who are your oldest and your youngest teachers?

E-mail answers to: discussion@drmarlo.com and answers will appear next month. Your state of residence, your first name and last initial will be used unless you tell us not to use them. Anyone who responds and also includes a mailing address will receive our NEW INFORMATION CARDS. The new temporary tattoos are also in and you’ll receive some of those as well.

Thought For The Day: All the grass is green. Enjoy yours.

PERSONAL GROWTH EXERCISE
To spotlight our E-Coaching services, our newsletter includes a personal growth exercise each month. These exercises illustrate the kinds of activities our clients are asked to complete when they are using our E-Coaching services. The exercises printed here are quite general in nature, but the exercises sent to our E-Coaching clients are individualized to meet each client’s specific needs. We currently offer a package of 10 E-Coaching Sessions for $500.

I-Pod, Therefore, I Am

It seems that the I-Pod is not only here to stay, but has finally begun to transcend all age brackets. It is no longer a piece of hip and trendy technology just for teens. Children down to 8 or 10 years of age are toting their favorite Disney tunes around, 20-somethings are building play lists for their gym workouts, the over-30 crowd is downloading news broadcasts and “oldies” from the ’80’s and 90’s, professionals over 40 are completing continuing education requirements by subscribing to podcasts, and Grandmas and Grandpas are taking morning walks accompanied by their favorite artists from the 40’s and 50’s.

Regardless of whether or not you own or use an I-Pod, one thing is certain, that today’s technology makes it very easy for a person to listen to exactly the type of music or radio or audio broadcast that they want, exactly when they want to, and that’s what this month’s exercise is about – what we choose to listen to.

If you have an I-Pod or other MP3 player, or even a more ‘archaic’ device like a CD player, tape player, or even a record player (kids, you can ask your parents what that is), take a moment now to write down the top 10 things you’ve been listening to lately. There are no right answers. It may be a certain album that you are listening to over and over, it could be a special playlist you made for yourself, a podcast to which you subscribe, a favorite CD or cassette, a radio show, an educational program, it doesn’t matter what it is, just write it down.

Once you have listed the top 10 things that you’ve been listening to lately, try to determine what your list ‘says’ about you. Is it all music? All talk? All fun? Angry? Business? Serious? Silly? Self-Improvement? Country-Western? Ethnic? What is the nature of what you’re listening to? Are the songs all about love? Hate? Sorrow? Triumph? Struggle? Pain? Death? Conflict? Prosperity? Loyalty? Patriotism? Spirituality? What is the tempo like? Are they peppy? Fast? Slow? Rockin’? Dance music? Loud? Dark? Is what you’re listening to designed to help you work out? Learn? Process emotions? Keep you from taking out your anger on someone? Advance your business goals? Cheer you up? Remember old times? What is the purpose of what you’re listening to? And, finally, what are your choices in audio entertainment doing to you? How are they changing you for the better or the worse?

Once you have a good idea of what you’re putting into your life via your I-Pod or other audio channels, you can then decide if your choices are consistent with your life goals or if you may want to modify your playlist to focus on areas you want to enhance.

For a FREE 5-Session Trial of E-Coaching, send us a report of how this activity worked for you! We may share your report in our next newsletter with your name, last initial, and state of residence (unless you tell us not to). Send to FreeSessions@drmarlo.com. (Offer Expires 10-16-07)

Local Author – Book Review Submission – Pain, Power, & Promise

Resiliency expert, licensed professional counselor, personal success coach, 2001 U.S. Open wheelchair tennis champion, author, speaker, mother, wife and wellness consultant. Each of these roles signifies a commendable achievement for any individual; together, they form an extraordinary list of credentials for one person to attain. But when the woman who fits the bill is a sit-down person in a stand-up world, the magnitude of her accomplishments is astonishing.

Nannette Oatley is the woman, and her story is highlighted in her newly released book, Pain, Power & Promise: 19 Ways To a Bolder, Stronger and More Resilient Life! The inspirational/self-help books chronicles a woman who not only overcame extreme adversity to lead a life of triumph and courage, but who has chosen to turn back and help others create amazing lives as well.

What others are saying:
“Pain, Power & Promise might just change the way you look at your life and the world around you forever…it is the story of a remarkable journey”
— Tom Rath, #1 New York Times bestselling author of How Full is Your Bucket?

Nannette Oatley is an exemplary example of a heroic survivor who emerged from many physical and emotional trials stronger and better. Anyone reading this book can gain the wisdom of a hero without having to go through all the same ordeals”
— Al Siebert, PhD, Director of The Resiliency Center, Author of The Survivor Personality and The Resiliency Advantage

Pain, Power & Promise paints a real life picture for living out loud in full color. Read it, own its message and get after your life!
–Jeff Olsen, Olympian, Pan-American Gold Medalist, President of Well Nourished Worldwide

Nannette reveals the qualities all of us can use, if we make that choice, to create a meaningful and purpose-filled life. Pain, Power & Promise is engaging, compassionate and a must read.”
–Randy Snow, Olympic Hall of Fame, President of NOXQs, Inc.

To Order Your Copy Today:

Please go to http://www.thewheelchairbabe.com or phone toll free: 800-832-1952 and have your Visa, MC or AMEX ready. You may also find copies on amazon, borders, and booksamillion.

E-Coaching! Try it Now!
Not every problem is a mental illness. Not every issue is a trauma. Not every botherment is an emotional disorder. For life’s daily issues and for personal growth, now there is E-Coaching! Dr. Marlo Archer offers a 10-session consultation package for people who are not diagnosed with any mental illness who would just like some coaching, some guidance, or some personal growth. We are offering the 10-Session package for $500. Begin by using PayPal to send a $500 payment to DrMarlo@drmarlo.com, then send an e-mail to that same e-mail address, expressing your specific area of concern to begin!

Dr. Marlo’s Movie Madness – Entertainment and Education
Each month we show a free movie with a mental health theme. Interested parties can stay after the movie for a discussion about the movie. One credit informal CE awarded for a $10 fee. Networking 7:15-7:30pm, Movie at 7:30pm, Discussion until 10pm. Upcoming Features: Thursday, October 18 – Harold & Maude, Thursday, November 8 – Chocolat (Suggested by Dr. Michelle May, of Am I Hungry? book and workshops), December 13 – THE SECRET. January 17 – They Shoot Horses, Don’t They? Suggest movies for February 21, March 20th or April 17. If your selection is chosen and you have included your mailing address, we will send you a FREE DVD MOVIE from previous years’ Dr. Marlo’s Movie Madness. Sign up for Movie Madness updates by sending a blank e-mail with ‘subscribe’ in the subject line to MovieMadness@drmarlo.com.

Publish Your Work – Promote your PracticeTwo ways to publish – for free as a semi-anonymous author (your state of residence, your first name and last initial will be used), or, for $10, as a professional promoting a mental health practice (your full name, with credentials, address, phone number, and e-mail address will be included). We reserve the right to decline to publish any submissions. Current subscribers = 2644. Send creative contributions to: articles@drmarlo.com.

Dr. Marlo in the Media

We write a monthly column about teenagers for Arizona Together Newspaper, Arizona’s Good News “Newspaper,” Established 1991. Read September’s Article, “Walk a Mile In My Shoes” online. Arizona Together currently reaches 50,000 readers monthly who are interested in recovery from addictions of all kinds.

Arizona Republic’s writer, Susan Felt, interviewed Dr. Marlo about Back-To-School issues in an article that now appears in the Clarion-Ledger. Read it online to learn boundaries about homework.

Fox 10’s Ron Hoon interviewed Dr. Marlo about advice for wives whose husbands would soon be returning from Iraq. Regarding the impending intimate relations the returning soldiers would, no doubt, be seeking, she advised, “Ladies, start your engines!”

The Psychology Session – Internet Radio Show – SEASON THREE UNDERWAYWe’re Back! All three seasons of The Psychology Session are now available online – and – you don’t have to even download them anymore, you can just play them right out of the webpage! Let’s hear it for Producer Jon! We continue to welcome show suggestions and advertising sales. E-mail suggestions or inquiries to PsychologySession@drmarlo.com. Order SEASON ONE AND TWO ON CD! Only $20. Send requests to PsychologySession@drmarlo.com.

We appreciate how many people read this whole newsletter, including this very last line. Thank you. We are honored to have you as a reader! –Marlo J. Archer, Ph.D.

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